The swag and buckle.

On Christmas day my extended family was all together and my lovely aunt Jean (check out her incredible French skin care company, by the way: http://www.votrevu.com/corporate/public?page=/jsp/home.jsp) was wearing this really great “wrap” for lack of a better word. She said it resembled a turtle shell, but it was much too smashing for that. Being that it was pretty much a round piece of fabric with two arm holes in it she claimed you could wear it in all different miraculous ways while still feeling like you are in a bathrobe. And what, might I ask, inspires a girl more than a multi-functional, bathrobe-feeling, turtle shell? Nothing, is my obvious answer, and I thus set my mind that I, too, could create one. “It’s so easy to wear!” She said. “I look at some people and their outfits and I think, ‘What? Is it too hard to swag and buckle?! Put a frock over those yoga pants!”

Ok, maybe she didn’t say that last part about the yoga pants, but I know she was thinking it; because we all know that I was thinking it.

Seriously, girls. Swag and buckle a frock over those yoga pants. Or a turtle shell over those yoga pants. Or, for the love of donuts and all things good in the world, just swag and buckle something over those yoga pants!

Later in the week I had the joy of being with some of my very bests. You know the kindred spirit type? In the words of Anne of Green Gables, “Bosom friends”? Yeah, well that’s what I would classify these chicks.

And let me just say this: If you are blessed to have people in your life who “get” you, or who you don’t have to explain yourself to, or who build you up to love Jesus more than you ever have----don’t ever let those people go. Those people are God’s good gifts to you and they will show you a grace of Jesus that you will not receive elsewhere. Cherish your people, whoever your people are.

All that to be said, I spent the evening with some of those “people,” and naturally the topic of the turtle shell came up. One of them said right then and there, “Well how about we make a demo?! I bet I have an old bed sheet lying around,” and wouldn’t you know it, before I could say Tea-for-two-in-Timbuktu there was a bed sheet on the floor, waiting to be “turtled.”

(Is that a word? My autospell didn’t touch that one at all!)

Like all good items, though, we needed a design first. And this is what I could draw from memory of my aunt’s turtle shell.

And then of course you need something to measure the whole process with.

I remember that it was about as wide as my aunt’s arms were, but I had no idea it would come to this to figure out how wide my arms were. It was a very water-hitting-the-middle-of-your-head-torture kind of moment.

There was tracing to make a circle.

There was annoyed cutting.

The fabric was somehow still just a cut, wrinkled bed sheet.

But it was looking like we were on the right track.

How wide apart should the arms holes be?

“That looks a little more like angel wings than I remember.”

But somehow or another, we got pretty close.

Now this is a PROTOTYPE, kids. All the bugs aren’t worked out.

You can see, though, that the possibilities are….well…. we know there are at least three possibilities.

I think I might go buy some yoga pants just so I have a good reason to turtle myself.

Swag and buckle, chickas. Swag and buckle.

A shutting of mouths.

I just got off a two hour Skype call with one of my best girls. We went to the University together and were practically inseparable for a year, doing all types of crazy and not so crazy things.

She wanted me to teach her how to cook, so pretty much any time she was over at my house (which was every day) that year I would cook something for her “lesson.” The address was 1009 of the place I was living so our lessons were aptly named “Foods 1009.” At some point during the preparation of every meal I would make she would say in an excited tone, “This smells so good my teeth are sweating!”

What a doll.

We would take our own creamer to Panera, because, give me a break if you think I am going to pay $4 for a mocha just to study economics. Regular coffee was like $1.50 AND you got free refills.

We went to a few weddings together.

We garage-saled with fabulous finds to prove it.

We discovered how to use the camera on my laptop…..

….and then found out that it takes little or no time for 20-somethings to take on a more “maternal” role upon finding one’s old baby dolls from childhood while visiting your parents.

Anyway, we are great friends.

 Life has since taken both of us hither and thon, living on opposite sides of the state, seeing each other only a few times a year, but fortunately we are blessed with a friendship that can pick up where we left off.

As we were chatting she mentioned how she had just done a little study on Zechariah in Luke and was interested to see how the whole story unfolded. Zechariah is going about his job when an angel appears and says right away, “Zechariah, your prayers have been heard,” and then proceeds to tell him that a son will be born to him and his wife who will do spectacular things for the kingdom of God and literally be a mouthpiece to the nations.

But what does Zechariah do? Does he throw his arms around the angel in jubilation? No. Does he fall down and say, “Be unto me as you have said”? Negative. He says to the angel, “How do I know you are telling the truth? Are you sure about this? After all, it isn’t physically possible for what you just said to come true.”

                Can I just say that THAT is not the kind of boldness you and I want?

The angel of course rightfully responded by saying, “Well, if that’ how you feel about it, then you just won’t be able to speak until it comes to completion.”

My friend said the most interesting thing to me, “Look at that! God muted Zechariah so that he wouldn’t curse God’s blessings.” Isn’t that such a curious thing?! I have never thought of that before! And then I of course thought, “How many times SHOULD I have been muted because I was just running my mouth, cursing something that was actually a blessing of God?”

I don’t really have specific examples in my mind tonight yet, but I just wanted to share that great nugget with you. I need to be careful with what I say so as not to be worthy of a holy “muting.” Think of all the praises Zechariah could have given in those 9-odd months! Think of how he could have shared God’s faithfulness—God fulfills his promises-- that whole time! But, no. Silence. I want a mouth that praises, even if it is in blessings I don’t recognize as blessings at face value.

Extreme Great-Grandmothers {Last Installment}

Those are quite the ladies, aren’t they? What an incredible lineage.

On Sunday I was with a lot of my extended family at a Christmas gathering and I thought while I was there, "I wonder what Christmas parties were like for these girls?!"

Can you imagine!? I mean, of course they didn’t have Christmas because the CHRIST wasn’t born yet, but they had festivals! They had celebratory religious holidays! Imagine what it was like for them!

Did any of you notice in the genealogy (wait, did I have you read it?! Go to Matthew 1 and read it now if you haven’t already. Sorry about that!), that Rahab and Ruth were REALLY close together in the line? As in, RAHAB WAS RUTH’S NEW MOTHER-IN-LAW! Rahab birthed Boaz, Ruth’s redeemer. Seriously, what were Christmas get-togethers like for these chicks?! Could they look at each other and not burst into tears? Both of them knew in the depths of their being what it meant to be "Brought In," to be "Redeemed." They had both been women who were not, and now they were women who WERE. What a gift! Only God has the power to do that. You cannot will it upon yourself. You can only accept it when he offers it to you.

Jesus came to save you. These women are in Jesus’ lineage because all of these women were redeemed by that baby born in a barn. In Hebrews 11 it says that Moses did all of these things out of his regard for Jesus, the Christ who was yet to come. God the Father had told the Israeites that their Messiah was coming, and Moses believed in that Messiah. Every single one of these women believed in the promised Messiah, too. He was coming, and with his coming would come his redemption, the completion of their redemption.

I said it once before and I will say it again: Baby Jesus didn’t stay a baby. Baby Jesus was born to die for you. Do you remember those gifts the wise men brought to him? Do you know what myrrh was used for? Preserving dead bodies. Those wise men knew what he came to do, and you and I need to know it, too. Before Jesus came we were dead in our sins. BORN> DEAD>IN>OUR>SIN. Unable to please God, deserving of hell. Every single one of us. But God loved us so much that he became a man so that he could bear the punishment for our sins. If he wasn’t a loving and merciful God that wouldn’t make sense! Think about it: We sinned against God. God, the sinless, perfect, holy God came and bore the wrath of himself so that you and I wouldn’t have to! So that you and I wouldn’t have to be separated from God by our sin for all eternity. He came to reconcile us to himself. Romans 5:8 says "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Jesus died for his enemies. WE were his enemies. He died for US.

Please know that truth this Christmas season. Do not start another year without knowing Jesus as your personal Savior. He didn’t come for any other reason. He isn’t a "good idea." He wasn’t a "good guy." He wasn’t a philosopher. He wasn’t a prophet. He was God and he wants to be your Savior. Redeemer. Lord.

Romans 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.

This Christmas there is one gift that you need to receive. Receive the gift of the purpose that baby Jesus was born. Get grafted into that family tree we have talked about all week. Know what those women knew. Like Tamar, let your scarlet sins be washed white as snow. Like Rahab, open the door when he knocks. Like Ruth, live your everyday for the King. Like Bathsheba, welcome in the Wonderful Counselor, the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace, and you who have walked in darkness see now the great Light. Mary let God change her life; let God change your life.

I don’t know about you, but I want to be counted among the great women of the kingdom of Jesus Christ. Above all else I want to know my redemption and I want to live extreme for Jesus. Is there really any other way?

Extreme Great-Grandmothers. {Mary}

The mama herself.

I am sure that half of you had some kind of Christmas or Christmas Eve church service about Mary, and since she is maybe the most "famous" of our ladies, I only have one thing to say about her that I really glean from this story:
Mary let God change her plans.

It was difficult, it was ripe with public scorn and ridicule, and it was not what she had anticipated her life to be like. But that is what God wanted her life to be like. So she let him do it. She let him do things differently.

Luke 1:38..."Let it be to me according to your word."
When faced with the news that God was up to something, that was her response: Let it be.

And may that be OUR response to him, as well.
Let it be, Lord. Let it be.

Extreme Great-Grandmothers. {Bathsheba}

There is no other way to get around this: the story of Bathsheba is intense.
Consider yourself warned.

And there is a lot to this story, ergo, I will be using bullet points today.

 Go read it: II Samuel 11, 12, and I Kings 1, 2

Because you all just read it, I will give you no overview, just references.

1. The story starts off with Bathsheba having to do something she never wanted to do.
Put yourself in her shoes. Imagine if you will that you are Bathsheba. You have an army general husband who is not at home. He is fighting the war that a certain king is not, and you thus go about your days, minding your own business, when one day you get a messenger at the door. "Ah yes, Mrs. Uriah, the king saw you in the shower this morning and is requesting that you visit him. He won’t take no for an answer."

Excuse me, WHAT?!!? Saw me in the shower?!

I added that little "he won’t take no for an answer" because from what I have gathered over the years is that they had a high respect for the law in those days. If the king called you, you came. If he didn’t call you, you didn’t go. If you went when he didn’t call, you died. If you didn’t go when he called, you died.

Naturally, she went.

Did she know what the meeting was about? That’s what I want to know. Did she even know that he had seen her bathing? Was she able to question at all? The ESV says that the messengers "took her," which is very similar wording to when Esther was "taken" to the palace. I guess what I am getting at is that I don’t think it was a carriage that turned into a pumpkin at midnight. While she may not have been taken kicking and screaming, I don’t think she had much say in the matter.

Once she got to the palace, I think she had even less of an opportunity to negotiate. Now, it doesn’t say that she was forced into any act, and it doesn’t say she put up a fight either. But part of me feels like I get it. I mean, if she stayed at home in the first place there was a pretty good chance she would die. And if she didn’t do what the king wanted once she got there, there was a pretty good chance she would die. Does that mean that what she did was ok? Absolutely not. Quite the contrary. Both parties were direly wrong. But I understand why she did what she did, and all I can do is pray that if I was put in a similar situation, I would use the given grace to choose death. It definitely brings up things to think about. For instance, what lines do you have drawn so securely that come some situation, no matter what your outcome options are, you stick to what is Biblically the right thing to do? No ifs, ands, or buts about it. The decision was made in your mind a long time ago. Be prepared and know where your lines are, and pray about where your lines NEED to be. Because times will come when we HAVE to know and we won’t have time to negotiate.

2. Bathsheba’s life also was not going as planned! After the "incident," what happened? HER HUSBAND GETS MURDERED! Somewhere along the line I think we forget that her 5-year-plan was NOT to be married to David, but rather Uriah. The one she WAS married to when we meet her in the story. What I want to grasp is that Bathsheba was going about her daily life when BAM! All of the sudden this biggest choice of her life LITERALLY came knocking on the door. A choice she never intended to have to make and one that, no matter what she decided to do, was going to alter things drastically. And thus make the life she always wanted not possible.

3. We all know what happens later: Bathsheba finds out that she is pregnant by this guy. And THEN this prophet comes to David and says "Since you have done these detestable things, and since you have NO PITY on this woman, this child that will be born to both of you will not survive." It
talks about how David stays by the death bed of the baby the whole time. It doesn’t mention it specifically, but I know Bathsheba was there, too. Of course she was. She was this baby’s MOMMY. She was there. And then, the baby dies. Did she ever feel any guilt, I wonder? Surely she must have. David wasn’t the only one who had to go through this. David AND Bathsheba had to suffer the consequences of their sin. When the prophet came to David I really believe he had a change of heart, but even if God redeemed them from that situation, even if He was going to make good come out of it, they had to live in the wages of the sin they committed.

In that time did David try to make things right with Bathsheba? Did he apologize? He must have. A man after God’s own heart would have.

4. This is such an interesting turn then. David marries Bathsheba. So far in the story she was married and living her life, she was taken and gets pregnant by another guy, her husband gets murdered by the father of this baby, their baby dies, then she has to marry the guy.

Goodness. Sakes.

Can you imagine how much she had to forgive this guy? She had found herself at the mercy of someone who had no pity for her. She had found herself with regret from a situation she never wanted to be in or never intended to be in. I know without a doubt that some of you reading this have had to struggle through hurts and issues brought on by someone who has no pity. I know that because the girl who is typing this has had to struggle through that. What a strange thing finding yourself broken over a situation, attempting and (for me) sometimes failing miserably at forgiving someone who will never apologize and doesn’t want to be forgiven. Someone who doesn’t think that what they did was wrong, or know to the extent that it burned you.

"Seventy times seven," Jesus said to me about that situation. "Forgiveness isn’t just one time."

In certain situations you have to choose to forgive that person every day. Every time the devil wants to bring it back up, I have to muster the courage to say, "I yield my "rights" to an apology from that person." Bathsheba might have had to do that.

I hope that Bathsheba learned to trust David over time. I hope that David started acting in a way that deserved her trust. When their baby was dying, in those inky dark nights, did they iron out their relationship problems they had from the start? They didn’t have the option of running away from this; it was face it and deal with it, or forever be bound by your bitterness.

5. Fortunately, I think they did iron out their issues. Bathsheba acquired and kept a place of importance in the kingdom of Israel during David’s reign. Later, Bathsheba gave birth to Solomon. The king who would build the house of the Lord. The one who would become the wisest human man to ever walk the earth. The king who would experience peace during his reign.

Beauty for ashes, isn't it? Bless you, woman. Peace and wisdom came out of your trials.

I love the story of Bathsheba. She lived the truth; she birthed the truth. "The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; those living in the land of deep darkness, on them the light has shown…for to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

Surely a King will sit on the throne of David forever.

Extreme-Great-Grandmothers. {Ruth}

Oh, let out a sigh. Finally we get a story about a good girl.  J

                Who, might I add from a legalistic standpoint, was not one of God’s chosen people and Biblically speaking never should have married Naomi’s son.

                Probably haven’t heard that one in Sunday School, have you? An entire book written about an “unchosen” one?

                You bet.

                It’s kind of a God-thing.

                As we will see.

                If you haven’t read the story of Ruth, or if you just haven’t read it since the 4^th of July, go do so. It’s four chapters; it will take 20 minutes.

                Since all of you just read the book, the only overview I will give to the story is this concise little paragraph:

                This is the story of a young woman from the land of Moab, who marries an Israelite and is some time later widowed by causes we are not told. Along with her husband, her brother-in-law and father-in-law also pass away during roughly the same time period, we assume. Out of love for her mother-in-law, Naomi, Ruth stays with her unlike the other sister-in-law who returns to her family. Moving back with Naomi to the land of Judah, they settle into life. One day Naomi says to Ruth that she should go glean in fields to help out with their grocery bill. Ruth finds herself later that day gleaning in the field of a man named Boaz, who showed exceptional kindness to Ruth. Upon returning home that evening Ruth tells her mother that she gleaned in the field of Boaz, to which  Naomi goes, “Oh! He is one of our close relatives! He is our Kinsman-redeemer. Stay in his field. He won’t let you be harmed.” In an effort to get Ruth “redeemed” and to leave her life of destitution, Naomi tells Ruth to approach Boaz and ask him to “redeem” her; otherwise known as proposing marriage to the man. Long story short, there was another guy who also had the opportunity, but deferred to Boaz, thus making him the man for the job. Ruth and Boaz marry and Ruth has a son named Obed, who we later find out is King David’s grandfather.

The end.

                I hope you all read the passage. That was a terrible overview.

                I have to admit that writing this was not as easy for me as the last two posts. Call it “over-churched-numbness” but I kind of felt like I knew all about the story of Ruth, and worse yet, I feel like the majority of YOU know all about the story of Ruth. What is left to talk about? I don’t want to beat this story with a dead horse (wait?.......:).

                In my head I wanted to go into some great long rant about how God gathered someone who “should not have been” into the fold of his family. A good redemption story, that’s what I wanted. But, alas, none of that good inspiration came to me. Feeling slightly defeated, I prayed, “Ok, can you give me SOMETHING?”

               

                And I got nothing.

Well, nothing apart from one little nugget. It is nothing huge, nothing grand, and unfortunately you probably aren’t going to be so jazzed you punch through a wall, but maybe, like the rest of the story, it will bring a calm reassurance.

               

                At about the half-way mark in our book there is this one little line: “As it turned out, she was working in a field belonging to Boaz.” (Ruth 2:3, NIV version. ESV says, “And she happened to come...”).

                Did anyone else catch that?

                “AS IT TURNED OUT…”

               

                What kind of phrase is that?!? Are we talking about roulette? Did we all of the sudden start believing in luck or “good fortune”?

                Blah. That’s not Biblical at all!

                Which is exactly the point.

                Ruth was going about her life, figuring out what the new “normal” was going to be, trying to keep her and her mother-in-law from starving. She has just changed her faith, moved to a strange land, and finds herself in a town where everybody knows her history. She definitely could have felt alone or cursed; Israelites were supposed to “be fruitful.” She didn’t have kids AND her husband died. “Great.” She was not from among these people; she was an outsider. Imagine yourself in her shoes for a minute, no doubt, feeling rather small.

                But just when life couldn’t have gotten any more “beige,”--- I mean, she was gathering off the ground what others dropped out of their hands--- the tables were turned.

                “As it turned out….” her life wasn’t as random and obscure as she thought it was. Ruth was walking through the countryside when she found a field the people let her gather in. She didn’t know who it belonged to, and clearly even when she found out the name of the guy she didn’t know it meant anything. To her it was a day’s work; it was her survival. She was doing what she had to do.

                But “as it turned out,” God knew the man who owned that field, and the owner of that field knew God. And God knew that the owner of that field was the man who Ruth needed to know. Therefore, that man had servants picking grain that day, and those servants (who I think also knew the Lord {2:4}) let Ruth walk along behind them.

                Because that, kids, is how it happens. There was no random act of chance that people were in that field that day. It was no “good fortune” that the man who owned the field, the man who noticed Ruth, the man who showed Ruth kindness, was the man who was willing to save her. Luck was NOT on her side, the stars were not aligned and that was not some crazy coincidence.

                That was the sovereign hand of God.

                God wanted Ruth in that field that day. God knew from before the creation of the world that Ruth needed to be in that field that day. Ruth thought she was just going about her business. That she was living her totally “normal,” “beige,” “medial” life, trying to make all the ends meet. But Ruth had given her life to the Lord. She had said, “You will be my God.” And if there is one thing I know, it is this: When you are dealing with the One who redeems you, there are no coincidences.

               

No one is obscure to God. No life goes unseen.

                Apart from Ruth showing exceptional dare in giving Boaz a somewhat “strong” marriage proposal, she really is like all the rest of us. Kind of the girl next door. She knew her share of heartaches and struggles. She knew what change was all about. I am sure she was amazingly stressed at times. But overall, life for her follows the pattern maybe more of us face. And isn’t that the beautiful part? I could look at Tamar and Rahab and go, “Whoa, if these are the woman who came before Jesus, I have got quite a way to go!” I could easily get discouraged. What if my life is never that daring? What if I am not called to hide spies, or never need to exert righteous vengeance upon people, and what if I am never asked to be burned at the stake!? What if, like Ruth, I am asked to suffer some loss, and move here and there, and….go to the grocery store? What if my testimony is simple, and small? Will my normal life really make any difference?

                I think Jesus must smile at these thoughts that barrage my mind. I can feel so little sometimes, wanting to do big things. But I think Ruth is in the lineage of Jesus because she is the one that maybe most of us can relate to. Ruth knew her redemption, boy did she know it. How could she not? First she was allowed to be brought into the family of God! Secondly, she was shown extreme kindness on this earth by a man who saved her from destitution. She knew it, of that I am convinced. And if I am being honest, more than anything, more than escaping the flames or seeing cities collapse or causing huge controversy, I want to know that too. To be convinced of my redemption, without question. In the midst of what is my normal living, I want the calm reassurance that comes with deep-seeded belief that, while my life may not be huge, my life is not obscure. If unto me redemption has come, then “as it turns out” I have already seen the walls crumble and I have already escaped the flames.

Praise be to the God who redeems all of life’s “everydays,” and who can make going to the grocery store into something that gives birth to Kings.

Extreme Great-Grandmothers. {Rahab}

(Joshua 2. Go read it. Now.)

               

Also not a woman that most mommy’s teach their little girls to become, Rahab, gets a pretty bad rap along with Tamar. Prostitutes in general are not the typical role models that middle-America parades as the woman to be, although I would argue until I am blue in the face that most celebrity women we DO parade are far worse than prostitutes.

                In this great-grandmother’s defense though, I want to ask all of you the question: Why was Rahab a prostitute?

                You don’t know?

                Yeah, I don’t either. It doesn’t say. Like the last story, for the inquisitive woman I am, it leaves something to be desired. I would like details. Was she sold into prostitution? Was she widowed and this was her only option? Did she have medical bills and this was the only way she could pay? She mentions that she has father and mother, brothers and sisters, but no talk of a husband or children. Could her parents not afford her? Was she a burden? Was this her way to help support the family?

                Whatever the reason, apparently it was unimportant. What God needs us to know is that at the time we enter the story, when the Israelite spies are coming into the land to scout it out for a military take-over, we meet her and she is already a prostitute. Doing what they do.

                The real question we should probably ask is “Why in the world did the spies go to her house?” Other historical books also refer to her as an innkeeper, so I would like to think that she just offered some cheap lodging. I will give the boys the benefit of the doubt.  The text doesn’t give any information pertaining to that either, so what God apparently needs us to know is that Rahab was a prostitute, and spies went to her house to hide.

                They must not have been too discreet as almost immediately upon their entering the house, the king and all of his officials send word to her to give up the boys, to which she replied, “Yes, you are correct in saying they were here. You missed them, though. I would try going to look before the city gate closes. You might be able to catch them.” Against what I would imagine to be good judgment, they trusted her.

                A woman? A prostitute? In those days? They trusted her? Already you can see the hand of God, can you not? They shouldn’t have trusted her. She would have been of ill-rapport in that city AND she was, in fact, lying to them; she was hiding the spies on her rooftop.

                When the messengers leave she runs up the stairs, seizing her opportunity, and pours out her heart to these guys. “Listen. I know who your God is and I know who you are. The people in this city are melting with fear. We have heard the crazy things your God does. Our courage to stand against him is staggering because Yahweh your God is God in heaven and on earth. And I know that. Please extend to me the kindness of your God to myself and my family, because I have shown kindness to you. When your God overtakes this city, please take me with you.” They respond to her with rapt approval. “Your life for our life” they said. “Tie a cord around your curtains, so that we will know you still are on our side when we overtake the city.”

                A few chapters later when they come and when the “walls come tumbling down,” they rescue Rahab and her family and steal her away to become a part of the nation of Israel where “she lives among the Israelites to this day.” (Joshua 6:25)

               

                The story makes me stop and think: Is it the lying part? Is it the prostitute part? Is that why there are no flannel-board Rahab stories? It has to be, because everything else is spot on with this chick. I mean, I WANT HER HEART! We all should want her heart! She knew who she was, she knew where she stood with God, she knew she wasn’t in right standing with God, and she knew that a fate worse than death awaited her if she didn’t act NOW. Check it out. There the spies were, “Standing at the door and knocking,” and what did she do? She let them in. She even made a confession of faith! “I know that the LORD….your God is God.”

                She knew the power of God and was willing to abandon her homeland and its foreign gods for the One that was going to trample her idols.

                What heart! What willingness!

Rahab is a prime woman to be in the genealogy of Jesus. Can’t you just see her, a fiery old lady saying to some young chick, “Little girl, when Jesus comes knocking on your door, when the Holy Spirit comes and wants to change your life, you take it. No questions. No looking back. ABANDON IT ALL.”

Now THAT is Christianity at its core.

               

               

                I can’t read Rahab and not ask myself if there are things I won’t abandon yet? Are there walled cities I feel too comfortable living in, even though I will crumble with them if I stay? What fortifications do I find my security in?

The story goes on to say that not a single living thing in the whole city of Jericho survived when God gave the city over to the Israelites.

                Rahab wouldn’t have survived either. If she hadn’t switched camps and said, “Lord, you are God of heaven and earth,” she would have perished.

If I don’t say that---if YOU and I don’t say that---, about everything----about our eternal life, about how we live our life on this earth, about every aspect of our day to day business---we will perish. Just like she would have. God has got to have all of you or “having God” will do no good for you. He is not interested in half-hearted followers. He does not save you to not become LORD of you. Savior AND Lord. He has to be both. That’s what the gospel is! His Kingship. That’s what Christmas is! It’s the celebration of the inauguration of the kingdom of God in the lives of those who believe and are thus indwelt with his Holy Spirit. THAT is what we are celebrating. Baby Jesus didn’t stay a baby, do you get it?

Jesus said, “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him and he with me.” (Revelation 3:20)

Knock, knock, knock. All the time, knocking.

This Christmas, be like Rahab.

Give it all up, and answer the door.

Extreme Great-Grandmothers {Tamar}

Most people I know don’t really get into genealogies much. I have heard on numerous occasions someone say “I just don’t really get the book of Numbers. What do all of the ‘and he was the father of him, and so-and-so became the father of such-and-such’ have to do with anything anyway? I don’t get it.”

                Would any of you be surprised if I told you I was not one of those people? The book of Deuteronomy is like my favorite book in the whole Bible and it is right up there with Numbers in the “he beget him” lines.

J

                While genealogies may not be your forte, if they are the first thing that starts the New Testament AND they preface the life of Christ, well I hate to tell you this, but I think God is trying to say something.

                A few years ago I told myself one November that I was going to write every day for one hour (this was before I really started writing) about women of the Bible. I planned on hitting all of them. Just bang bang bang down the list I would go.

Yeah. I got real far with that.

Instead I wrote for hours and hours and hours about pretty much three women.

In the span of a month that is an average of 10 days a woman.

Much to my delighted surprise, during this month of Bible women it hit me for the first time that, “HEY! There are 5 women in the genealogy of Jesus!! That’s great!” But hey! Isn’t something wrong with that? I am by no means a Bible scholar, and even less of one on the histories of Jewish culture, but one thing I do know from a life of Sunday School, church, youth conferences, adult conferences, Bible college, personal study, and tons of downloaded Beth Moore sermons is this: Women are not, unless the circumstances are extreme, listed in Jewish genealogies.

(Trust me. I read a lot of Deuteronomy.)

In putting two and two together, kids, I would say that five women in one genealogy might tip a person off that we have got PROBABLY FIVE extreme cases on our hands.

All that to be said, during this week before Christmas I thought that it would only be appropriate if we took a look at Jesus’ very EXTREME great-grandmothers.

Today we study: Tamar (Genesis 38)

                By far she is indisputably one of the most controversial women in the Old Testament, if not the whole Bible. She is not what we would call a “good girl.” You don’t want your daughters doing the things she did. Then again, you also don’t want things done to your daughters that were done to her.

                The story of Tamar really starts in Genesis 37 where Joseph is thrown into a pit by his brothers, who then decide to sell him to a caravan of gypsies. Tamar’s story being next is an odd place to put her story and can leave you asking, “How does this apply to the lady?” It doesn’t, except that the brother who did the selling would end up being the brother who did some buying later in his life.

                After Joseph’s brother Judah had the idea of selling him rather than killing him because, “What will we gain if we kill him…?” he left his brothers and went to stay with a friend. I can only imagine that the Holy Spirit was not letting him rest easy at this point. Like most men who are trying to bury their guilt, he got himself a woman. A non-Israelite woman, at that.

Great. Nice work, son of Israel.

                Time goes by, he has three sons, the sons grow up, they are terrible men, and Judah thinks it’s about time the oldest one settles down. So he gets for his son, Er, a nice little wife; our leading lady herself, Tamar. All would have been well if Er hadn’t been such a terrible man, but he was, so God killed him. In the tradition of the day, the second brother inherited the wife. Onan, the new husband, was also a terrible man and refused to give her children, so God ALSO put him to death.

At this point the third son (who no doubt was going to be bad, too) is too young to become a husband so Judah has the great idea, “Hey Tamar, go back to your daddy’s house. I don’t want my third son to die because he is married to you, too.”

So she goes home.

OK! Hold the phone, kids. Something is grossly wrong with this picture. In those days, you didn’t just GO HOME!  You didn’t have that option! If you were a childless widow the end of the road for you had come. You couldn’t get a job, you had no money, you were a public disgrace and a shame to your community. YOU>WERE>DESTITUTE. Judah wasn’t just saying, “Go home and give me ten years,” he was washing his hands of her. “Let’s forget the whole thing ever happened.” He was throwing her away.

But I guess that wasn’t the first time he had ever done that, now was it?

                Time continues to pass with the destitute Tamar living in her father’s house. Years later she hears that her mother-in-law has died and that Judah, the man who had withheld from her any shred of life, was on his way to see to some business.

                I will warn those of you who are not familiar with this story that we are getting to the part that brings out some controversy. Up to this point she is a girl who has been tossed around against her will, leaving her penniless and without her dignity, being pulled through situations she never asked to go through. But now, well…..now she is about to change all of that. She has been withheld that which was rightfully hers. I like to call this section: The turning of the tides; justice will be served.

                As I said, Judah has gone to take care of some business. At a resting point, he looks over and sees what he believes to be the prostitute of a pagan god. Clearly this man is not a God-honoring Jew, so the fact that she is a PAGAN doesn’t bother him. He has also shown himself to have no respect for human life apart from his own, so that she was a PROSTITUTE wasn’t an issue either. He goes over to the supposed-prostitute, who we know to be Tamar in disguise, asks for a “favor,” she lists a price of a few of his personal items, he succumbs, the end.

Not really.

If the story ended here, it would be nothing but a terrible tale of revenge and the inner satisfaction of self-justification she would have gotten from humiliating the man who had ruined her. In that case they both would have died dead-wrong.

                Fortunately for us, this isn’t the end.

In the course of time Tamar finds out that she has gotten pregnant by her father-in-law, the oblivious Judah.

When he finds out all of this, in his own feelings of self-righteousness he says in a smug way, “BURN HER ALIVE!!!” As the flames are getting hotter and higher and she is walking to her sure death, she throws at his feet those personal articles he had sent to her as payment. No doubt looking him straight in the eye she says, “The owner of these things is the man who got me pregnant. Maybe you recognize them…”

Whoa.

Talk about a bold move.

I guess at this point she had nothing left to lose.

Recognizing those things as his, Judah says to her the most unusual thing: “You are more righteous than I.”

He finally provides for her a home and she gives birth to twins.

The end.

I’m serious this time. The end.

Wait. What?!?!? The end?

Blast.

Can I be honest? I really don’t know what to make of this story. It gets me all legalistic. Righteous? I mean, if we were comparing her to him, yeah, but righteous? On a scale of 1-10? “Like -6 for both of them,” I want to scream! “Righteous might be the wrong choice of words, buddy.”

WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE EITHER OF THEM DOING IN THE LINEAGE OF JESUS?????

I should throw my laptop across the room and completely give up on genealogies.

Hmmmm.

~~~~~

It has started to snow while I have been typing this. It’s incredible how quickly everything can turn white.

“Lord, how can such a sordid story in your family history bring you glory?”

There is no further mention of Tamar in the Bible. That is all we get.

But it does mention Judah. Maybe I am using too much liberality, but somewhere along the line I think Judah finally got it. In the continued story of Joseph it is hard to see him as being the same person that did such terrible things earlier in his life.

After the father of Judah and Joseph and “the Twelve” dies, Joseph says to his remorseful brothers (the same guys who sold him to gypsies) a line that to me brings the whole story full-circle.

(Gen. 50:19-20) “But Joseph said to them, ‘Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done: the saving of many lives.’”

I suppose I have to break down this legalistic rage this story produces.

I mean, isn’t that---the saving of many lives---- the story of Jesus? Aren’t people like Judah and Tamar the reason he came? Aren’t people like me the reason he came? Terrible people who do terrible things. We are all terrible people. We all have sordid stories. My own self-righteousness aside, I must admit that those two are no worse than I am.

Maybe they aren’t the wrong people to be in his genealogy.

My yard is now white for Christmas.

Maybe these were the people God chose to be his ancestors because maybe, just maybe, more than anyone else, they knew the depth of the need he came to meet. And they knew to the depth the grace that met that need.

“Come now, let us reason together,” say the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow.”

Never be convinced of your own desires.

There are two things I have to say to preface this post:

1.       I have decided that my desires are not trustworthy.

2.       I use the word “WANT” a lot in this post. Please bear with me on this blog as I attempt, no doubt rather unsuccessfully, to come up with better ways to use the English language.

So, I came across this picture a few weeks ago of boat-loads of newlyweds.

It got me thinking: What would have happened if I had gotten everything I wanted in the last four years?

I am sure at some time in the last four years one of my wants would have been to be a “newlywed.” Now? Not so much.

Of course that question is preposterous. To get everything on the list wouldn’t have been possible. If I had gotten a few of the first things I had wanted, that would have changed my life, thus not leading me down the same roads I have travelled and not leading me to all of the other wants that made it on my list.

Does that make sense?

As in, if I could look back on the last four years and make a list of the wants I have had, if one, two and three came true then six, seven and eight wouldn’t have had a chance to present itself because I wouldn’t have been in those times and places that birthed those wants. I hope that’s understandable.

Back to the question, though. What if I had gotten everything I wanted over the last four years?

In showing a discredit to my judgment, I honestly have to say that I would be miserable.

Those things that I then wanted are now to me either repulsive or at best just very BLAH.

The irony about the whole thing is that at the time when I wasn’t getting what I wanted, I was thinking that I was miserable! All the tears, all the midnight phone calls to best friends, all the wonderings, all the questioning of “Why God are you not doing this for me?” What a waste of my time. If I had gotten what I desired, putting an end to the pain of that “lack,” I would have ended up in even worse shape.

Hindsight can make a person thankful for grace.

There is no doubt that the way things have worked out, and even to a certain extent all of the pained misery and what it caused to grow in me, was what God wanted. Those unfulfilled desires, and how Jesus chose to respond to me in them, are a large part of what constitutes who I am right now and why the Bette that sits here typing this is not the one she was four years ago.

Praise the Lord.

On numerous occasions have I stepped out of a season of my life, looked back on that perceived want I didn’t get and yelled at the top of my lungs, “Thank you GOD for not giving me that!!”

Oh the untold wisdom of my God.

I think he must look down at me and all of my sincere ignorance and just smirk. Because it is sincere! Whenever I am in those miserable stages I find myself so convinced that there is nothing else in the world that would be good for me. “How will I go on without this!? What is a girl to do if I don’t get this!? I will explode, I am sure.”

There is also this tendency to somehow think that God is holding out on me. Because I am not getting what I am convinced is best for me, it causes me to have a lack of trust. After all, isn’t God out for the good of those who called according to his purposes? There really is no other obvious answer than God is mean.

Ha.

But that’s not true.

God is good. All the time.  

More so than I know.

In every situation thus far, not getting what I wanted has proved to be nothing but grace and keeping me from a medial existence.

In my life lived apart from those things, I have discovered time and time again that I don’t actually want that anyway! I was wrong all along! God’s plan tends to reveal other REAL desires that I didn’t know I had and would never have known if I had been given a “Yes” to those prayers rather than the received “No.” Most of that previous stuff was fluff. It would have kept me at a level of living lower than where I am now. It would have been settling.

What a beautiful thing to find new desires, too! The constant discovery leads me down roads towards adventures and experiences I never would have otherwise had. Not getting what I wanted has given me opportunities that have given me some of my best stories.

Think about it: If I had not "waited"—if I had just taken matters into my own hands and GOT THINGS DONE--- I may have gotten what I wanted, but I would have stopped short of where God wanted me.

See, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure…” (Jeremiah 17:9) My desires are terribly flighty. Sometimes I feel they leave as quickly as they come. Here today, gone tomorrow. My wants cannot be trusted.

I think about how much of my life I waste while focusing on the agony of not getting “that which I most desire.” What could I have been praying for instead?

Long story short: God not giving us what we want is His good grace towards us.

I am so glad God knows better than to give me all I ask for.

And, if you don’t take anything else away from this, remember this phrase:

Never be convinced of your own desires.

Dwellings.

I have said it before and you will no doubt hear me say it again: I love houses.

This is the house I grew up in that my parents still live in:

This is the house I live in right now with the cutest little older couple. It’s their house:

Clearly I have been blessed with some pretty splendid dwellings.

Which is why I love houses.

I read my first Better Homes and Gardens when I was 8 and started drawing blueprints then.

I read more than 75 design books by the time I graduated high school. 75. Easy.

I have awakened in the middle of the night to sketch a blueprint of a house I saw in my dream.

I see people as if they are houses. What your personal style is when I see you on the sidewalk is very similar to what kind of house you live in; and I know how to decipher such things.

Don’t ask me how. It’s a gift. I don’t know either.

After I went to college I was designing less and less. Maybe because I all of the sudden had friends and spent my time with people rather than my sketch book (which for the Christian is usually a good idea). Whatever the cause was, I would go months without being inspired enough to jot something down. Not even just inspired enough to jot, but really just inspired at all. I would go months between when those gorgeous destinations in the brain would surface.

Then I noticed a change in my design process. All of the sudden I wasn’t seeing whole houses. I wasn’t necessarily even seeing whole rooms. Sometimes it would just be a desk or a bathroom floor, or even more shocking, sometimes I would just see the feeling you would get upon entering the room.

I know, I know.

I just said “see the feeling.”

I know.

I meant to say that.

I am glad you see how strange that is, but I have no other way to describe it.

What would also happen is that this feeling would stick in my head for days, weeks even. Sometimes I would start seeing more of the room, maybe more of the house. It was nagging, if I am being completely honest. To be haunted by a half-completed room is almost unbearable for a girl who won’t allow herself to take longer than a weekend when she is painting and all re-doing a room.

After a while, whether I had seen the rest of the house or not, the house would fade in my mind and I would no longer daydream about different widths of distressed wood floors.

But it wasn’t until I was journaling one day, I think, or maybe I was driving, but I could have also been doing dishes…..whatever I was doing it struck me like a bolt of lightning: That feeling I would see was whatever I was feeling for that specific season of life.

For instance, in that season of my life where all I wanted to do was crawl into a hole and never see most people again, you better believe I designed a stone house which sat in a foggy meadow surrounded by hundreds of acres of woods. Very untouchable. Or when I was resigning myself to the fact that some specific prayers about things that were current desires were NOT going to be transpiring, I designed a reclaimed barn, full of ins and outs. I called that house “The Good Things” house because the verse of that season was Psalm 103:2, 5. “Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits…who satisfies your desires with good things.” The truth of this verse is that he doesn’t always satisfy our desires with what we desire.

But he satisfies our desires with good things.

 And “no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.” (Psalm 84:11)

Isn’t all of that interesting?

After I made these realizations it took me a step further. Not only was the feeling in the house the feeling of mine for that season of life, but the house held the specific comfort or strength that I needed HIM to be.

It would make perfect sense.

When I couldn’t take it anymore, I needed him to be stone walls. Or when I wasn’t getting what I thought would have been great for me, I needed him to show me that good things were better than my wants.

The last couple weeks an image has been milling about. I don’t see a whole lot of it, but I do know I will call it, “The House with Many Stairs.” Something to nestle in to.

I don’t know how he will fit in yet, but I know he will.

He always does. After all, Moses knew what he was talking about when he penned, “Lord, you have been our dwelling place.” Psalm 90:1