Deep.

Lately:



You see that red line, right? And no, it's not broken.

Winter's chill brings out my closet's finest offerings: I love fur coats.

I decided I wanted a new bag. So I made a new bag.

Who do I think I am? A woman of 5-feet-9-inches when barefoot, and I go and get these for Christmas? And then proceed to parade around my house for days on end wearing these....

One of my sweet sister in laws got me this sweet grey nail polish for Christmas. And it doesn't seem to wear off. Which is a great news..

Tincture: Orange wedges, chunks of ginger root, agave or honey. Drink with hot water. Eating the orange peel along with the fruit and ginger? Optional. But suggested! I can't get enough :)

You know, it never ceases to amaze me how the Holy Spirit can lead you to a scripture you have read literally hundreds of times and all of the sudden—BAM! You understand something which had previously eluded you.

This weekend it was Psalm 42.

Go read it.

Now, about this time last year I wrote you a cute little series entitled “Living Water" so I am not really sure why water is becoming the New Year’s week trend, but, alas….there are many things I am not really sure of. Add it to the list.

That being said, I think I always thought about this passage in the context of water before. As in, our soul is thirsty. Thirsty like how our bodies get when we don’t have enough water.

Which. That is entirely true.

Trust me, I have no intention of changing all your glorious thoughts over that song we sang and sang and sang in the 90’s.

“As the deer panteth for the water, so my soul longeth after thee!!!”
(I am belting this out in my studio right now. You should be glad you are not here)

But it struck me last night that, while, yes, we understand the concept of soul-thirst because we understand the concept of body-thirst, hence the reason they use that analogy, has it ever occurred to you that David might be talking about souls in GENERAL, not necessarily HIS??

Because, let’s be honest. A lot of times I feel like my soul is thirsting for something else. And I can read that and think “Oh my gosh, I am a terrible Christian: my soul is not thirsting ‘after thee’—I wish it was! But really, I seem to have a hankering right now for __fill in the blank_____ instead.”

I know I am not talking to a brick wall right now.

I know some of you know what I am talking about.
That nagging feeling that you don’t love Jesus enough because all your mind and senses is telling you right now is that you actually want something else.
And you feel like you shouldn’t feel that way.

Well, here is what I have to tell you. Don’t feel guilty!! It’s not that you love Jesus too little and that’s why you want something else!
It’s simply that you can’t read your desires.
You don’t know what your desires are actually telling you.
Because you think that you are desiring—(and by “desire” I mean that deep longing which you feel inside you, a longing you may not even be able to name for truly, our desires are deeper than our language--), let’s say….wealth. A spouse. A best friend. To be understood. To stand out. To not be seen. Power. For your honor to be defended.
You get the idea.
Whatever is in you that gnaws away until it penetrates like a driving December wind.

And we put those words to it: wealth, spouse, confidante, beauty.

Whatever.
That’s what we are convinced we desire.

But.

But, I don’t really think that’s what the Bible says…..

Could it be?

Is it possible we have been wrong all these years?

“My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.”

See, I don’t really think our souls desire that laundry list of external things. True, our sinful nature may want some of those things, I won’t argue with that.

But our soul?
That penetrating desire?

Say that line outloud: “My soul thirsts for God.”

That, Wolfies, I believe is the truth.

Your soul wants God. And God alone.

Why? Because back in Eden it had him.
He was the soul’s first love.
And your soul misses him. Wants him back. It’s desire is for him.
Your soul thirsts for God.
Your flesh may want other things and you know what? You may get them. But they do not satisfy you.

They do not quench your thirst.

If our souls desired external things, then we could satiate ourselves with external things. We could, therefore, also put a name on all of our desires. We could pinpoint them, we could write them down.

But desires? Desires that are only fulfilled in God?

I fear our language doesn’t begin to understand that, articulate that.

A clue to this is seen just 4 verses later.

"Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me.”

Is David lost at sea when he wrote this?

No.

But what is deeper than the ocean? More powerful than a tsunami?

What is deeper and more powerful than all your desires?

The beckoned answer for both of those is, “nothing.”

See, I think David knew the truth. His soul—your soul, my soul, every soul that has ever walked this earth—thirsts only for God.

And the deep recesses where your soul resides, that we can’t seem to articulate? All the hidden parts of you that speak as from the bottom of the ocean?

It’s the deep calling the Deep.

Because the deep of us calls only to God.